For a woman who has experienced abuse from her partner, her memory of the abuse is an important guide for her as she moves forward. What he has done in the past, he is likely to do in the future. Surviving life with an abusive man often means mentally putting abusive episodes to the side…
In this video Jill continues to explore the impact of abuse – confusion, feeling all alone and feeling crazy are all very common experiences for women living with abusive men.
1) With abuse, the conflict will seem to be more about your partner trying to win the argument or hurt you with his words instead of him genuinely trying to constructively work out a problem. 2) With abuse, you will notice that your partner is thinking almost exclusively about what is good for him, not…
A powerful public service announcement from the Canadian Women’s Foundation: http://www.
A very powerful video about the impact of verbal abuse. Helena Bonham Carter lends her voice to this public service announcement:
This post is from ShamelessSurvivors.com: It doesn’t start off with a punch in the face or a knock down fight. It is a gradual desensitization. Pushing the limit just a little each time. A comment here. Criticism disguised as concern for you. Teasing in the uncomfortable zone. Testing you to see where the resistance is,…
Abuse happens when there is an imbalance of power. It is impossible to understand abuse – when it happens and how it happens – without an examination of power. Sometimes the women I work with have done things they are ashamed of in their relationship. They have slapped their partner across the face or thrown…
Helping professional are well intentioned but sometimes for women experiencing abuse, that help is not helpful. In fact, sadly, sometimes the ‘help’ is harmful to women. How is this possible? Well, let’s think about the dynamics of abuse. Men who are abusive are motivated by a desire to have power and control over their partner….
Have you ever thought, “If my partner hit me, I would leave”? We wonder if this is true. We know that women don’t find abuse acceptable, but a simple equation of abuse = leave ignores the complexity of most women’s lives. It is easy for a person to say this if they have never been…
Domestic Violence Awareness Month is October. The purpose is to help people become AWARE of the various ways someone can be abused and not know it. When you love someone, you expect them to treat you with respect, courtesy, gentleness, patience, kindness, putting you first and most importantly, faithfulness. But some people are in relationships…
#5 Don’t be surprised that the abuse continues after separation. Men, who are abusive, will continue to abuse after separation. They will do this through any ties that the man and woman still have in common (eg. children, assets, the court process, pets, mutual friends etc.) Many women find the first year or two after…
#4 Be a listening ear and know that you need to be there for the long haul. It is very common that a woman will need months or years to put a plan in place that will lead eventually to a better life. As outsiders, we often hear women’s pain and want to do something…