Frequently asked questions

Women have many questions about their relationship and can be discouraged by the lack of support and information they receive from family and friends. Some common questions women ask:

Am I experiencing abuse?

Many women find it hard to imagine that they are being abused by their partners. Part of the struggle has to do with the negative stereotype our culture has of ‘battered women’ and ‘abusive men’. If neither you nor your partner fit the stereotype, it may be even harder to imagine that you’re actually being abused. Read more

What about my children?

Remember, people who are raised in homes with an abusive dad can still choose to live in a different way as adults. Recent research suggests that living with a mother who has protected them from harm, even if they have seen and heard the abuse, will protect children from long-term effects of abuse. You can do a number of things to help your children learn about respectful relationships. Read more …

Close Up on WomanIs there a pattern?

Most women, living with an abusive partner, find it hard to see any pattern to the abuse. His behaviour seems bizarre and unpredictable. It seems unbelievable that the same person, who is kind and affectionate one day, could be cruel and malicious another. His hurtful behaviour seems to come as isolated events. You may think of him as a generally “good guy” who does some really awful things once in a while. Read more …

Other questions that women ask

Is there something wrong with me?
Why do I stay?
How do I heal from the abuse?


Profoundly helpful

I give a copy of When Love Hurts to every one of my clients. They all find it profoundly helpful. The book rings true. The authors show a deep and comprehensive understanding of what it is to live with abuse. Women say to me, ‘This is my story ! Only the names are different. How…

Great resource

“When Love Hurts is a great resource for any woman who is tired of taking the blame for a painful relationship. If you wonder why the man you love is hurting you — and what you can do about it — this book will give you all kinds of useful information and strategies for changing…

This book saved my life

“This book saved my life 4 years ago when my neighbour handed a copy of it over the back fence to me. She had heard my husband’s raised voice the night before. I have since given away more than 20 copies to friends who confide in me what is going on in their relationship. Every…

Excellent resource

“This is an excellent resource not only for women to use on their own but also for counselors and advocates.” Dr. Mary Russell Professor of Social Work, University of British Columbia, Canada

She will find the strength, validation, and insight

“Every woman who is struggling to understand the mistreatment she is experiencing in her relationship should begin by reading the wonderful book When Love Hurts. In these pages she will find the strength, validation, and insight she needs to reclaim her life and return it to its rightful owner – her.” Lundy Bancroft, author of…