when love hurts > Blog > Supporting Women

Currently browsing Supporting Women

Five important things to know about men who are abusive…

Published on 2012 08 02 | by Karen McAndless-Davis | in Supporting Women

Five important things to know about men who are abusive…#2: An abusive man presents himself to family and friends as a “great guy”. As a society, we have this idea that abusive men are “monsters” but in reality abusive men present themselves in a very positive light. Most of the time they function in social settings very well. They can be charming and outgoing. Sometimes they will be very helpful to others and generous with their time. For this reason, it is extremely important that friends and family believe a woman when she takes the courageous step of saying that her partner is controlling, hurtful or abusive.

Five important things to know about men who are abusive…

Published on 2012 08 01 | by Karen McAndless-Davis | in Helpful Ideas for Women, Supporting Women

#1: An abusive man functions well in the world. As a society, we tend to believe abusive men fit a stereotype – they are unemployed and/or drunks. In reality abusive men usually function very well in society. They hold down jobs, own homes and most often relate comfortably with family and friends. If we think […]

Does Abuse Have a Pattern?

Published on 2012 07 03 | by Karen McAndless-Davis | in Helpful Ideas for Women, Supporting Women

This video explores the Cycle of Abuse. This is the behaviour pattern of an abusive man. Karen describes the three phases of the Cycle of Abuse: Honeymoon, Tension Building and Explosion. This video will help those seeking to support women who have been abused as well as women themselves.

Abuse Breaks the Covenant of Marriage

Published on 2012 05 29 | by Karen McAndless-Davis | in Helpful Ideas for Women, Supporting Women

So often Christian women stay longer, in abusive relationships, than non-Christian women. This is usually because they believe that they have vowed to stay “until death do us part”. But abuse breaks the covenant of marriage. The man has vowed to “love, honour and cherish” and his abuse has broken that vow. The marriage is over, […]

Who is really in denial?

Published on 2009 01 02 | by Karen McAndless-Davis | in Supporting Women

Sometimes as I interact with other professionals they suggest that a given woman, dealing with abuse, is “in denial” about her situation. Such a comment makes me crazy. I realize that some women do not always dwell on the full gravity of their situation because it is just too overwhelming. They deal with as much […]

Support Groups

Published on 2008 06 27 | by Karen McAndless-Davis | in Helpful Ideas for Women, Supporting Women

This past week was the end of another amazing support group here in the Vancouver area. At the close of the evening, women shared what the 10 weeks had meant to them. They talked about the power of being listened to, respected and affirmed. They spoke of how wonderful it was to be in a […]

It’s Not That

Published on 2008 02 22 | by WLH Team | in Helpful Ideas for Women, Supporting Women

We used this reading last night at the end of our support group. It was written by a colleague of mine (Elsie Wiebe-Klinger). I think it says a lot about the truth about abuse. It’s not that… I think that abusive behavior is ‘normal’ or that I’m attracted to abusive men, Rather, When abuse happens, […]

The Cycle of Abuse

Published on 2008 02 11 | by WLH Team | in Helpful Ideas for Women, Supporting Women

Is there a pattern? Most women, living with an abusive partner, find it hard to see any pattern to the abuse. His behaviour seems bizarre and unpredictable. It seems unbelievable that the same person, who is kind and affectionate one day, could be cruel and malicious another. His hurtful behaviour seems to come as isolated […]

Am I experiencing abuse?

Published on | by WLH Team | in For Helping Professionals, Supporting Women

Many women find it hard to imagine that they are being abused by their partners. Part of the struggle has to do with the negative stereotype our culture has of ‘battered women’ and ‘abusive men’. If neither you nor your partner fit the stereotype, it may be even harder to imagine that you’re actually being […]