The women I work with, who have experienced abuse, are not selfish. In fact they are most often caring and compassionate people who focus a great deal of attention on their children and others. Sometimes, if they are still with their partner, they also pay a lot of attention to him and try to make…
Abusive men blame their partners for everything. This is one of the hallmarks of abusiveness. They will blame their partners because their kids don’t want to see them. They will blame their partners for abandoning them. They will blame their partners for “destroying the family”. But really, the abusive man is just facing the consequences…
I have worked for 18 years with women who have experienced abuse. In my experience, there are a few common things men who are abusive say about their ex-partners. Perhaps most commonly, they say the woman was “crazy”. They may even go so far as to say the woman was diagnosed as mentally ill (often “bipolar”) when…
I am sure you’ve heard it before. “It takes two to tango.” It’s a lie. If a person is actually talking about dancing, it may be true, but if they are talking about relationship problems, it is not true. It takes two people to make a healthy and happy relationship. It takes two people to be mature…
When a woman has experienced abuse from an intimate partner, friends, family and helping professionals tend to be very free with their advice. Women get told they should try harder to make the relationship work. They should have better better boundaries. They should love their partners more or they should be patient and wait for…