I hear the theory that if a woman was abused as a child she will think abuse is “normal” when she is an adult. This idea makes me angry and here is why. If we suggest that because a woman was abused as a child, she thinks abuse is normal, we are suggesting that she…
Over the years, many women have said to me that on their wedding day they knew they were making a huge mistake. Societal pressure to go ahead with the wedding once the invitations have been sent is huge. Some women confide in a friend or family member about their fears but are often told they…
#4: Listen to your gut! If your gut (or inner voice) is saying to be careful, be careful! The man’s friends and family may say he is a “great guy”. Your friends and family may think he is a “great guy” but if there is something inside of you that is making you feel uneasy,…
#3: Does he speak negatively of his ex-partner? If a man says that his ex-partner is crazy or abusive, be cautious. Abusive men always say this about their ex-partners. To their own detriment women often believe a man when he says this about his ex. It is often only years later that the woman learns…
#2: Is he trying to rush the relationship? Not all abusive men try to rush the relationship but many do. One way a woman can try to protect herself from an abusive man is to try to slow everything down. If he says, “I love you” too soon or wants to move in together right…
1#: Will he respect your “no”? Abusive men like to be in control and so one way for women to protect themselves is to see how a man reacts to her “no”. If she does not want to go to the restaurant he suggests, she can say “no” and suggest another. If he wants to…