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The shooting that took place at Sandy Hook Elementary in Connecticut is beyond imagination – beyond any nightmare our brains could make up. I found myself yesterday turning off the radio and deliberately avoiding any news on the TV. Simply put, I did not want to know. I did not want to know the details….
Thoughts about “self-esteem” and “self-care”
It drives us crazy how some people suggest to women who are experiencing abused that they should work on their “self-esteem” and that somehow, this should stop the abuse. It won’t. Nothing the woman does will stop the abuse. Only the abusive person can stop the abuse. But even after separation some people think that…

Victim or Survivor?
VICTIM or SURVIVOR? These words hold power! We may toss these terms around without considering this. I have used them both many times referring to myself. For a long time I embraced the word “victim”. It helped me realize that what had happened was not my fault. I wore it like a badge of honor…
Two Important Words
Since I wrote about Jackson Katz, I have been thinking about another campaign that is run by men and focuses on what men can do to end violence against women. The White Ribbon Campaign has grown dramatically since it’s inception and now claims to be the largest movement of men, in the world, working to…
How to identify abuse: #1 The “fear factor”.
How to identify abuse: #1 The “fear factor”. So the question has been asked: “How can we tell who is the abuser and who is the abused?” We know that 83% of the time (Stats. Canada), if abuse is being perpetrated in a relationship it is the man who is being abusive. But we also…
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