Ann, not her real name, did our support group for women who have experienced abuse. She wanted to share part of her experience in the hope of helping other women. This is what she would like to share… So the time has come that you realize you are in abusive relationship. The counselling, talking, explaining…
VICTIM or SURVIVOR? These words hold power! We may toss these terms around without considering this. I have used them both many times referring to myself. For a long time I embraced the word “victim”. It helped me realize that what had happened was not my fault. I wore it like a badge of honor…
When I was living with my partner, I was on the maximum dosage of anti-anxiety medication that was allowable. A higher dosage would not have been safe for me. Still, I was anxious all the time. My partner saw this and said “clearly you are mentally ill”. And sometimes I thought he was right. But now that…
Shirley Parkinson was murdered by her husband of 27 years in Oct. 2014. Her family is speaking about her death in hopes of raising awareness. It has been brought to light that six women have been murdered by their male partners in the last year in Saskatchewan. I appreciated Piya Chatopadhyay’s coverage of this story…
In our support groups, stories are central. The group is a safe place for women to talk about what is happening or has happened in their lives. For many women, the group is the only place they can talk about these things. We see how, by getting to tell the stories of their lives, women…
Below is submitted by Lisa Stephan. She wanted to share some of what she (painfully!) learned in her marriage. Thank you Lisa for sharing some of your story! Welcome words splashed across my screen each evening as a new relationship formed with a Christian man in Arizona. Words I read hungrily as I learned…
In 2015 it is very hard to cut off contact with an abusive ex. Many women report that their ex-partners will continue to verbally and emotionally abuse them, after separation, using texts. They will send threatening texts or crazy-making texts, texts that will have them feeling sorry for their ex-partner or texts that will make them…
If you have separated from your partner, you are probably still sabotaged in your attempts to mother your children. Sometimes, painfully, women lose custody of their children to their abusive ex-partners. Some abusive men work hard – post separation – to alienate the children from their mom. These are some of the hardest and most…
Ever wondered what a full apology might look like in the face of real harm or abuse? A friend of mine is a counsellor who works with men who have been abusive. She shares with them the 3 steps to a full apology. A man who has been abusive, who wants to start to heal…
Many women report that their ex-partners will continue to verbally and emotionally abuse them, after separation, using texts. Sometimes a woman will come in to an appointment with me and hand me her cell phone. We will scroll through the texts together and the pattern of abuse is clear. Sometimes the abuser may do what…
We were so pleased to see a great article in the Montreal Gazette telling several women’s stories of experiencing abuse from their partners. We were glad to see a description of several types of abuse including financial, religious and cultural. The article talked about how long it takes to rebuild from an abusive relationship. It…
I recently heard Dr. Ronald Siegal of Harvard medical school speak about suicide and anxiety. He said that studies have shown that most people who attempt suicide later describe that it was not depression but rather anxiety that drove them to depression. That’s interesting because I think most of us think of depression as being…