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The When Love Hurts blog

Planning for Safety

How can I plan ahead? It may be difficult to plan for the future. Part of the struggle may be that your partner’s abuse leaves you exhausted and off-balance. Because of this, it may be difficult to do more than just get through the day. For some women, the physical, financial or social threats their […]

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The Cycle of Abuse

Is there a pattern? Most women, living with an abusive partner, find it hard to see any pattern to the abuse. His behaviour seems bizarre and unpredictable. It seems unbelievable that the same person, who is kind and affectionate one day, could be cruel and malicious another. His hurtful behaviour seems to come as isolated […]

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How do I heal from the abuse?

Each woman’s journey to wholeness and safety, after the devastating experience of abuse, is unique, yet there are some important similarities. The healing process tends to involve periods of intense grief and sadness as well as periods of rebuilding and hope. Here’s what one woman had to say about the journey of hope and sadness. […]

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Is there something wrong with me?

In order to keep yourself (and your children) safe emotionally and physically safe, you’ve had to pay a great deal of attention to your partner. You probably carefully monitor your partner’s moods and behaviours. You may not have had much opportunity to see how his abuse affects you. Here a partial list of Impacts generated […]

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What about my children?

Will my children grow up to be abusive? If your children witness your partner’s abuse, you are probably concerned about what they are learning. You may worry that your son will grow up to be an abuser or that your daughter will think that abuse is ‘normal’ and marry an abusive partner. While it is […]

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Why does my partner hurt me?

No doubt you have spent a lot of time and energy trying to figure out what causes your partner to behave the way he does. Listed below are some common explanations that women struggle with as they try to make sense of their partner’s behaviour. 6 myths about abusive men My partner has a problem […]

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Am I experiencing abuse?

Many women find it hard to imagine that they are being abused by their partners. Part of the struggle has to do with the negative stereotype our culture has of ‘battered women’ and ‘abusive men’. If neither you nor your partner fit the stereotype, it may be even harder to imagine that you’re actually being […]

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When Love Hurts