I have been reading about attachment theory recently. Attachment is primary to our being. It is how we have survived as a species – sticking together. Our attachment impulse keeps drawing us together with the other. First with our mothers (when we are very young) and then with others. I read recently that we are not actually wired for losing someone for good. So when we lose someone permanently – through death or for some other reason – our whole system says “NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!”. We are pushed to do something that we are not actually wired to do.